Therapy for High Conflict Couples in Crisis Anywhere in Washington

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Divorce has been discussed

One or both of you have mentioned divorce. That seems be the only thing you are looking forward to these days. Divorce is a fantasy to escape to when you are stuck in endless fights. Fights that leave you feeling blamed, accused, misunderstood or so plain tired. Maybe you’re sleeping in different rooms, living in different worlds, and weekly therapy can’t meet this level of urgency. A decision is approaching and you want to act from clarity, not from crisis.

This is me

My Approach

I'm not going to pretend I only understand this work from the outside.

I know what it feels like when love cools into numbness. When numbness hardens into rage. When rage settles into something that feels permanent — a kind of despising you never imagined you were capable of, especially toward someone your children adore. I know the particular guilt of that. The way it sits in your chest when your kids run to your spouse and you're standing there feeling like a stranger in your own family.

I did the work. Ten years of it — slow, nonlinear, unglamorous weekly therapy. And what came out the other side is a marriage I wouldn't have recognized from the floor of the worst of it. We're genuinely close now. We're each other's first call. I don't say that to sell you a fairytale. I say it because I need you to know that I'm not asking you to hope for something I haven't seen with my own eyes.

What turned it wasn't a breakthrough moment. It was the decision — made separately, by two people — to stop waiting for the other person to change first. That radical inward turn is the hardest thing I'll ever ask of you. It's also the only thing that actually works.

In the room, I'm warm and I'm direct. I'm not here to referee or keep the peace. I want to see the real shape of your relationship — including the parts that are hard to show a stranger. You don't have to prove yourself here, or win me over to your side. You just have to be willing to be honest.

I can hold whatever you bring. That's not a performance — it's the result of doing this work on myself, and with couples who were just as far gone as you might feel right now.

I like this

The problem isn't your partner. It’s not entirely you either.

Most couples arrive focused on their partner's behavior. What they leave with is something harder to come by — genuine curiosity about themselves.

The conflict cycle you keep repeating isn't the problem. It's the portal. Inside it is every unfinished piece of personal history that never got resolved, now living in the space between you. What's on the other side is real compassion — for yourself, and eventually for each other.

What this asks of you isn't easy. You'll need to set down your pride and take radical responsibility for your part — not after your partner goes first, but regardless. Most couples underestimate how much that costs.

Here's what I tell almost everyone: nobody is only a victim of their relationship. Everyone contributes a gift. Everyone also contributes to the dysfunction. That's not blame — it's actually the most hopeful thing I can offer you.

Something shifts when you finally see your life — and your relationship — without the fog of blame and fear. That clarity is what we're building toward.

Credentials

  • Bachelor of Arts in Sociology and Communications from University of Connecticut, Storrs

    Master of Arts in Counseling from Western Seminary

  • Licensed Mental Health Counselor in Washington State, LH60907817

  • IFIO™ Advanced Training: Love, Autism and ADHD; June 2026; Relationship therapy training for couples are neuro-different

    All Genders Welcome Workshop: Internal Family Systems with Trans And/or NonBinary Communities June 2026


    Restore, Reclaim, and Resource: A Weekend With Resmaa Menakem; June 2019; Somatic Abolitionism Training

    Perinatal Mood Disorders: Components of Care, November 2021, Sponsored by Postpartum Support International

    Advanced Perinatal Mental Health Psychotherapy Training, November 2021, Sponsored by Postpartum Support International

    Advanced Perinatal Mental Health Psychopharmacology Training, Nov 2021, Sponsored by Postpartum Support International

    Somatic Experiencing Beginning Level 1- August 2020

    Somatic Experiencing Beginning Level 2- August 2020

    Somatic Experiencing Beginning Level 3- Jan 2021

    Somatic Experiencing Intermediate Level 1 March 2021

    Somatic Experiencing Intermediate Level 2- June 2021

    Somatic Experiencing Intermediate 3- Oct 2021

    Somatic Experiencing Advanced Level 1- Feb 2022

    Somatic Experiencing Advanced Level 2- April, May, June 2022

    Group Supervision and Consultation for SEP Certificate from 2020-2024- 30 training hours

    Cultural Competence, Sept 2025

    Intimacy From the Inside Out, IFS Level 2, Feb, March, May, June 2025 (72 CE hours total)

    Telehealth Training, Washington Mental Health Counselors Association

    Law and Ethics of the Clinical Use of AI, 2024

    Working with Suicidal Clients, Wellspring Sept 2016

    Suicide Assessment and Prevention, Sept 2025, NetCE

    Becoming a Clinical Supervisor Training, May 2022

    Internal Family Systems Level 1 Training March 2023

    Healing Interventions for The Trauma Addiction Cycle, Cece Sykes, Nov 2025

    Ongoing regular individual and group consultations with Keisha Bryan

    PACT training, Level 1- 54 hours Sept 2016

    Ketamine Assisted Therapy Training, Fluence 2022

    Psychadelic Assisted Therapy Training, Fluency, 2022