ARE YOU FINDING YOURSELF:

BUSY HELPING, SERVING AND DOING SHIT FOR OTHER PEOPLE

Sometimes you forget about what you want and need? Maybe you are so out of touch with yourself that you have no clue about what you want.

DOING ALL THE "RIGHT THINGS"

But you aren't happy? You have the house, the car, the kids, the partner and shit, even the dogs. And even the job. But you ain't happy. There's something off. You don't even know yourself anymore. You don't know how to even start looking for yourself.

SCARED OF DISAPPOINTING OTHERS

You don't want to reinforce boundaries, heck, WTF are boundaries? You don't want to challenge status quo because it's too exhausting to think about the fight that might ensue.

SCARED TO START YOUR NEW BUSINESS

Imposter syndrome has got a hold on you. It's got the best of you and you are stuck. paralyzed. frozen. procrastination is your best friend.

OVERWORKED AND UNDERPAID

You are so burned out, but you overextend yourself on the daily. You work late into the night, and even into the weekends. asking for a raise or a promotion scares the shit out of you.

TRYING TO CONTROL EVERYTHING

you find yourself trying to control other peoples perception of you. You say white lies to your kids so they can continue to believe the best in you. you try new diets to control your appearance.

 

At the end of the day, you don't believe you deserve to be happy.

 

MAYBE...

 

You feel guilty for wanting to take space from your toxic family.

You feel guilty for wanting time apart from your kids.

You feel guilty for wanting to draw boundaries with your job.

You feel guilty for wanting more. For wanting something different.

I AM A RECOVERING PEOPLE PLEASER

been there. done that.

I had a "happy" family (on the outside). My mom and dad were very functional (in appearances only) and seemed "normal". They were middle class folx, struggling to provide a better life for me. High school class president. Graduated honors from university. Got married. Moved overseas to work for a religious non profit. Was I happy? No.

I spent my life trying to fit into other people's mold that I lost myself. I was fixated on not stirring the pot. Not disappointing. Not bringing up my preferences. I somehow got lost in the mix.

This came to a head when I had my firstborn. My firstborn had extreme eczema and secondary skin infections that lasted for almost 18 months of her infancy and toddlerhood. People had so many things to say to me about how to "fix" my daughter. Unsolicited was given, left and right.

That was around the time that someone in our family (no names shall be named) shamed us for our medical decisions in treating our daughter's eczema. They reminded us in how my partner and I were disobedient and failed as parents to our daughter because we failed to heed to this family member's rigid advice. 

This was a huge turning point in my life. 

I realized that I had to decide... do I choose trying to be "obedient" to make others happy, or do I choose my own happiness?

I chose my own happiness. I chose to find my own voice. I chose to follow my own path.

I became obsessed with finding my voice.

I have always invested in my personal development. I've been in therapy for almost 20 years. I took a shit ton of trainings, certifications, and even went to graduate school to study counseling. 

I was obsessed with finding my identity. my voice. my sense of self. 

This is exactly what I can guide you through. I can help you find your voice too. Find your sense of self. Find your identity.

 
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HEYYYYYYY GIRL. HEYYYY.

I'm Angela BTW. (she/they)

I'm pretty sure I can help you. Why? Well, I've spent the past decade+ as a therapist helping countless people like you..... 

let go of perfectionism, fawning, people pleasing. 

And as a result....

they were able to find themselves. find joy. find bliss. do whatever the fuck they wanted without feeling guilty. 

 
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REASONS FOR WORKING WITH ME:

  • First-- I've lived through a shit ton of trauma and survived. Actually, I am thriving. I love myself and am living proof that you can be a badass bitch without being a meanie or bully to yourself. 

  • Second-- I do a lot of learning. I am obsessed with learning and growing. Maybe to a fault. either way, I am eager to share it with you. 

  • Third-- I get results. After a decade+ of being in this business, I've worked with a shit ton of people who are a living testament to self love and radical self acceptance and hospitality. People have broken up with their controlling partners. Drew boundaries with their toxic family members. Started businesses that they were so afraid to pursue. Stood up to their abusive bosses. 

  • Fourth-- I received a shit ton of training in this stuff. I value growing and learning. I have my masters degree in counseling that is KCREP accredited... Additionally, I am an Advanced Level 1 trained Somatic Experience practitioner. It is an intense 3 year long program with training modules, group practices, individual supervision, and consultation. I am also trained with PSI (Postpartum Support International) in their Perinatal mood and anxiety disorder and Advanced Perinatal Mental Health Psychotherapy Training. In addition, I am a Level 1 PACT therapist with an HAES informed, body positive, anti-oppressive, social justice oriented lens.

  • Fifth-- I have received therapy for the past 20 years and will remain in therapy for the rest of my life. This is perhaps the most important piece of my personal development and "training." I am constantly checking my own biases, my own shortcomings and exploring my strengths, within the container of safety with my own therapist. This is so important as I am working extra hard to not project my own shit on you. 

  • Six-- I am engaged in peer led consult groups, where I am constantly sharpening my skills seeking accountability in my biases. My people keep me grounded and challenge me to deepen my love for myself and others. 

 

RANDOM SHIT

I am a first generation Chinese American child of Vietnam war refugees. I am a “geriatric millennial”.

I believe no one is illegal and ALL Black Lives Matter. I am an intersectional feminist that believes that everyone deserves a chance at the table. It is a human right to be in secure functioning relationships. It's not enough to be kind and nice to everyone. We must challenge the system of oppression and to the parts of us that collude and are complicit with those structures. 

I’ve been married since 2008. I have 3 kids aged 7, 4, and newborn.

I believe love is love and people of all identities and should be able to partake in the benefits of the institution of marriage regardless of how they look and who they love. I believe all LGBTQQIA++ and folx with various gender identities and fluidities are entitled to the same rights and advantages as cis-get folx.  

We are an unschooling family. I believe all humans have an innate curiosity for life and sometimes adults need to get out of the way so kids can be kids. I am unschooling myself and divesting from institutions that perpetuate colonization of the mind. I am committed to lifelong learning and cultural humility.

I love boba. pizza and pho. I believe boba is life and I'm not sure I can live without it. if you haven't tried boba yet, you're missing out.

I believe in liberation for all. Our oppression and healing are all intertwined with each other. I believe we are on hostilly occupied territory belonging to Indigenous folx and support to the Landback movement is part of liberation for all. Please join me in supporting https://www.realrentduwamish.org